• Thesis:  note the precise and explanatory nature of the thesis.  This is also good because it presents a novel view; it is not simply a re-hash of ideas presented in lecture.

• Introduction: Note that the introduction does not include any extraneous information, but simply sets up the paper.

• Sentences in green: Note the topic sentence.  It states the central point of the paragraph, and the rest of that paragraph supports the claim being made.

• Sentence in blue:  Note the transition sentences.  See how these sentences connect the point from the previous paragraph to the point of the current paragraph in a way that brings out the logical relation between them.  These often double as the topic sentence of the paragraph.

• Sections in purple.  Note how the author has explained the significance of the cited passages.  That is, she has shown what the passage illustrates and how it supports the main point being argued for.

(I seem to have lost the last page of this paper, which is why it cuts off so abruptly, but the last paragraph is clearly the conclusion, so this should give you a reasonable sense of what a good paper looks like).
 

Thesis: The death of Palinurus is a necessry episode in The Aeneid because it not only articulates Virgil's theme of personal sacrifice but it helps to communicate Virgil's skeptical, unclouded views about the Roman Empire
 

    The death of Palinurus is a necessry episode in The Aeneid because it not only articulates Virgil's theme of personal sacrifice but it helps to communicate Virgil's skeptical, unclouded views about the Roman Empire.  Palinurus' death enables Virgil to emphasize the harsh and darker means by which the empire was founded and the not-so-perfect ends which resulted.  The incident also allows Virgil to show that although the Romans may have been correct in celebrating the greatness of their empire, they should also have been aware of the many prices that were paid for it.  The sacrifices made by Virgil's characters show clearly that the empire, in all its glory, had an ugliness about it too.

    Palinurus' life is one of the many precious things sacrificed throughout the course of this narrative.  The plot of The Aeneid dictates that Palinurus be killed because one Trojan life is required by Neptune to ensure Aeneas and his follwoers a safe passage to Italy.  Palinurus is a dutiful, loyal, and trustworhty man.  His death is a gtreat loss, but he was not the only one of virgil's character stosuffer so intensely.  The hero Aeneas loses his gentle innocence, his wife, and his lover.  Honorable and moral Dido loses her authority, her dignity, her lover, and her life.  However, waht mesk the death of Palinurus such a particularly striking example of sacrifice is his essentially unflawed qualities as a man.  The reader is never given any reason to doubt or question his character.  Palinurus is a dedicated leader who until the very end, is concerned more for his compainions than for himself: "...I was take by no fear for myself; I was afraid your ship...might swamp in such a surge" (Aeneid VI,11.463-65).  Palinurus dies trying to protect Aeneas and his men.  Through this sympathetic character's death, Virgil is able to show the immense sacrifices that are necessary in founding the Roman Empire.

    Virgil's acknowledgement and acceptance of the fact that the Roman Empire is not a perfect institution make it possible for Virgil to write realistically and with a sense of objectivity.  In writing about the death of Palinurus he is able to communicate his understanding of the empire's integral flaws.  In Book V, 1.1120-23, Parlinurus asks:

And who are you asking me to act as if
I did not know the face of this calm sea
and its still waves?  Do you ask me to trust
this monster?

Virgil is using the sea as a metaphor to show the dual-nature of the Roman Empire.  The "face of calm" that Palinurus mistrusts is the empire's appearance of civility and lawfulness.  The "monster" that Palinurus guards against is the ugly nature of empirical rule and the brutal means by which it is established.  Virgil is telling the Roman people that they must exercise caution in trusting the empire just as Palinurus knows he must exercise caution in trusting the sea because both entities can be pernicious.  The sea may have "still waves" but they only hide the rage beneath the surface.  Likewise, the empire may be a wonderful idea but, undeniably, it is driven by a violent force.

[click here for further comment on the following transition]
    The violent characteristics of the empire are made painfully clear with the tragic death of Palinurus, who, in all ways, is the epitome of a good Roman man.  In composing The Aeneid Virgil gave Palinurus the role of the pilot to further affirm his role as a guide, not jsut as the steersman of a ship, but as a guide in all aspects of life.  Palinurus' admirable qualities make him a respected and valued advisor to Aeneas.  Throughout this narrative, Palinurus trust in ihs instincts and his knowledge from past experiences.  Palinurus has faith in his sophic wisdom: "no even if high Jupiter himself should guarantee his promise, could I hope to reach the coast of Italy beneath a sky like this" (Aeneid, V, 11.22-25).  Even though Palinurus is able to acknowledge Aeneas' destiny, he cannot surrender all of his judgmetn to the prophecies of the gods.  This sense of self-assurance and strength that dominates Palinurus' character makes the following passage particularly striking:

...as he fell
he tore away part of the stern and helm,
and often cried, in vain, to his companions
                                                (Aeneid, V, 11. 1135-37)

Falling overboard, Palinurus, ever-dutiful, clings to his station of the ship.  True to his character, Palinurus is strong and bold to the end.  Thus, with respect to Palinurus, this scene is not out of the ordinary.  It is unusual however, that none of Aeneas' men would hear Palinurus' cries.  It is odd that the pilot, such a central and vital member of the crew, could be pulled form the sihp and his disappearance would go unnoticed.  Clearly, Virgil is using his passage to do more than simply describe the loss of Palinurus.

    As Palinurus' death serves to represent the negative aspects of the Roman Empire, his fruitless cries described in the passage cited above serve to represent the Romans' obliviousness to those negative aspects.  Not only do Aeneas and his men no hear Palinurus' pleas for help as he is taken in by "the monster" of the sea, but Aeneas believes that it is by Palinurus' own fault that he falls overboard.  It is in fact the tricery of the god Sleep and the forces of the sea that pull Palinurus into the water.  Moreover it is Aeneas' destiny and the future founding of the Roman Empire that lay at the root of Palinurus' death.  Without the sacrifice of Palinurus, Aeneas cannot meet his proper fate.  The plot of The Aeneid makes the death of Palinurus a necessity and Virgil uses Aeneas' misunderstanding of the incident to represent the Romans' ignorance of their empire's true colors.

    In writing about the death of Palinurus, Virgil is able to esxpand his theme of personal sacrifice and convey his critical views about the Roman Empire in a few relatively short passages.  The episode allows Virgil to acknowledge the unforgiving and brutal nature of the Roman Empire while revealing the Romans' mistake of overlooking or choosing to ignore it.  This episode also allows Virgil the emphasize the many tragic sacrifices that were made in order to found the Roman Empire.  Palinurus is an unflawed character who has his life taken so that the empire may be established.  Palinurus' death is not only essential to the plot of The Aeneid in that it enables...