A Journey: A Path Less Traveled

By Sxwpilemaát Siyám

It takes courage to go down a path that nobody really travels. I am just one of those souls. My spirit and heart guide me, along with the wisdom of my ancestors. I see my grandparents, dad, aunts and uncles, who have already gone, with their beautiful faces and voices whispering gently to me…words of wisdom and guidance along this hard, challenging and sometimes difficult journey. Along the way, I have questioned my ability, my skills, and my willingness. I have questioned my ability to move forward, whether I wanted to, and whether I should. Was I the one to do this work? I have never questioned my knowledge, knowing and ways of being. I am actually more grounded in them, then ever before in my life. Thus, I prevail.

I see those with me today, my husband, son, mom, sister, family, elders, and community members supporting me through it all (even if they don’t know it) and having complete faith in my visions and work. I close my eyes and see the spirits of my unborn grandchildren watching and waiting for good things to happen for their arrival. My spirit, heart and soul believe so deeply in a new way, steeped in our indigenous ways of knowing and being. I am the transformative storyteller sent here to do this work, with purpose, passion and commitment to guide our children’s future.

I still have so much to learn, ways to grow, to become better but also teach and share. This journey has been slow, in so many ways, much to my dismay but trusting that it is all happening for a reason. While being frustrated with my inability to move faster despite it all and the pressure put upon myself as I see the expectations of others weigh upon me. Not really acknowledging the difficult path laid before me when I started this journey, as things typically, have come easy to me in my life. I have learnt all the way, becoming wiser in each moment of pondering, visioning, thinking, questioning, sharing, and in the spaces of curiosity and clarity through discussion and dialogue.

Balancing two world views, constantly throughout the journey, and swaying between them in moments of uncertainty but always coming back to my own knowing as the foundation for everything required in this work. I am a transformative storyteller and know that I can and will leave a new legacy for our future generations. Some days, I am unclear about how to do that, but I find the place where I need to take one step forward and start. I always trust that it will always flow from there, that the creator, the ancestors and my unborn grandchildren, guide me as I move through the work.

I knew I had the vision, from a very early age, and knew that I was responsible for many in that vision. That only I knew how to articulate it and when the time came, would lead the work necessary to achieve it. I was groomed to be a leader as I came from strong families of leaders. I also know, that I am a spiritual being having a human experience and that my spirit is pure love and light, and that everything I do is with pure love and light. My spiritual faith guides me, always. This comes from my culture, my connectedness to place, land and all living creatures. Our songs, dances, ceremony, everything restores this knowing and faith. I know who I truly am when I am in these spaces and how my spirit calls for me to give and be more.